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How very special are we
For just a moment to be
Part of life's eternal rhyme...
How very special are we
To have on our family tree
Mother Earth and Father Time...
He turns the seasons around
And so she changes her gown...
But they always look in their prime
They go on dancing their dance
Of every lasting romance...
Mother Earth and Father Time
I cannot begin to express the amount of hatred seething through me after the events of this morning from my trying to just be there for my daughter as she goes off to her first day of school.
Hilarious events but also quite insulting.
To sum up... School calls the cops on me... I sit and wait for the cop to arrive so I can be my regular arrogant self.
Cops arrive.
Cops: "Are you Jesus?"
Me: yes.
Cops: "you here to see you daughter before school?"
Me: "yes"
Cop"did you see her?"
me "Yes"
Cop turns to the principle: "What the hecks the problem then?"
I couldn't stop smiling. lol
It a rare thing that my absolute need to play by the rules actually pays off, but yea, it is because of it that I am where I am today. Tragic how people remove themselves from my side because they cannot handle my honesty, morals and need for balance and intolerance of abuse. Strange how I'll always miss who they pretended to be, towards me.
"Regret is usually a waste of time. As is gloating."
Daughter : places a black dressed lego dude on a black horse, places a white dressed lego dude on a white horse::
"They are camouflaged. This guy is camouflaged in black when he goes out at night, this one is camouflaged when it is bright outside."
Me: But... the guy in black... he's wearing sunglasses in the middle of the night? You sure that's a good idea?
Daughter: What him? Nah, he's not wearing sunglasses. He's just so cool.
My father taught me I'm alone in this world.
My mother, how to lie.
My sisters, Patience.
My friends, how to be callous.
The beginning of my relationships, that there is love;
The endings, that it's rare.
Your indifference, that there are others more important.
Your stupidity, that I have much to learn still.
Your disloyalty has given meaning to Honor.
Your coldness increases my want to be warm to others.
Your Lies, push me to be Truthful.
Your absence, how to be there for others.
Your misery, how to smile.
You lack of Humor, how to laugh.
Life teaches me that I'm still alive.
If anything, What have I taught you?~~~~
LOL @ kismet: " I do not wish to be inducted. Don't induct me." It's almost like... there isn't a section on the site that tells you how fucked you are when it comes to that issue. LMFAO.
And find out what you are
Hello, my name is human
And I came down from the stars
Hello, my name is human
I'm ready for love and I'm ready for war
But I'm ready for more
More or less?
One would suppose that if
absolute control was had,
things would never get out of hand.
That is what control boasts, is it not?
Misleading.
So during the cook out sunday I lit four tiki torches in out backyard... and after I did so I looked around and announced to everyone.. "Well, I guess we're white supremacists now!"
Fantastic day, yesterday cooking and having the get together. Littlefoot loved it all and could not sit still longer than 10 minutes or so. She missed those kids so much. Loved her presents and almost set her cake on fire, lmfao. Sparklers with do that. She decided to try out a video game for a few minutes and spouted comments such as "I'll check the door, after I'm done checking to see if there's anything hidden around in the room." For not being influenced by me, she's turning into quite the witty little gamer. Haha. Then, she picked up her violin to practice. Like I said, she couldn't sit still lol.
I don't know what to do exactly while I examine myself and things around me today. Basing my observations on both what I know and what others have chosen to provide as their own take on things relating to me. Many people do this: They get described or called or belittled in such a manner over prolonged periods of time, they begin to believe something of what is said. It makes them question themselves, doubt themselves at times, it can break them. People are strong, I know I've been strong enough to not let it drown me in doubt, but the doubt has been there and the pain been real. My doubts, that's what this is about, a small satisfying glimpse into what some will say versus what is.
I've been told several times, during times of anger, pain and hurt, that I've played the victim. I need someone to blame for everything I do. That I always have an answer. That I believe I am perfect, therefore, someone else has to be at fault. I was told this... repeatedly. In various ways, but always with the same effect, that I needed someone to blame. And always, funny enough, played the victim in oddly similar if not exact situations. I've always asked people what they think of me, because I wonder how I come across to people with both my words and my actions.
Several years ago I got myself into a situation, something that it was on me to rectify. Now it has come time where my not doing so, has developed a much worse situation, as one would expect. I sit back and I smirk, shaking my head at my indolence, finding some slight comic relief in the fact that I could have avoided this, but did not. And while dealing with this, I sit back and ask myself, wait why am I not angry? Why am I not upset? Why? If I'm so great at looking for some scapegoat to make me feel better about myself, why am I not? Why did I feel the need to question this? I know what I did, I know what I need to do, taking the steps to do so and I'm solely at fault. Best of all, I'm not upset and content at the experience. God... I'm such a victim.
I know how you feel. Everyday I am a victim to this but I am ok yes I was broken over the severe mental abuse I had before. I brought myself back up, not 100% obviously, and am continue to live life the way I see fit. Way I see things is like this you can either focus your attention on the bull shit and have it affect everyone near,close,or around you negatively Or you can ignore it and focus on the finer things in life such as: family, hobbies, going to events you like, ect. There is so much bull shit in this world and in a lot of people we forget we can be above that and be positive towards other things. Yes we can say we have been victims but we can come out as survivors and say "yeah, we lived through it and fought the battle. At least I won and walked away a better,stronger person." We often do things others have done to us because we were conditioned to that. Thats ok as long as you help youself get better or go get help. I have made mistake and done as others have done to me. I fix it and done my best to make up for it. Thats what counts right?...the effort? Well anyways you get what I am saying. END
Yeah. Working and moving past it is the victory. But some might and will call you setting that experience to memory and speaking of it as not overcoming it. Which is a humorous logic. None of the lessons we learn are simply learned without reason, and if you want to pretend to forget the reason you learned something, well what's the point? Then you get to be a righteous piece of shit, while pretending that experience comes from somewhere, yet claiming others should never "focus" on the memories. lol. I refuse to do to other's what has been done to me. Because i know how it feels. Others not so much.
Its not forgetting what you learned it forgetting all the negative things that happened and what was said. You will never forget the whole thing shit I never did. I never forgot what i did learn. I just never dwelled upon it now because it would hinder me from moving on. I refuse to hurt anyone it is not who i am that we both know. As for others...People will be people both shitty and good. We just have a place that we fit in its a matter of finding it. Life is a experimental roller coaster. You have your good and bad times. I hope you find what it is you are looking for. I know I did.
Pleasant greetings.
23:36 Aug 09 2017 Times Read: 1,118
Well, well, well. Aren't you a cool drink of water? Come let's have a drink. I'll buy.
Wear your convictions as vestment of honor,
your moral heart will silken the proof of your stance;
smile defiantly, patiently in the gaze of those
whose fevered yearn to call you dishonest, just can't.
“The truth is always an insult or a joke, lies are generally tastier. We love them.
The nature of lies is to please. Truth has no concern for anyone's comfort”
The Devil's Carnival Alleluia
The Down at the Midnight Rectory - Adam Pascal
The Agent:
Down, down, down at the midnight rectory,
we jiggle juice frisking under the marquis.
The Peacocks are strutting behind velvet rope,
sipping away on their heavenly dope...
Down, down, down at the midnight rectory!
We jiggle juice frisking under the marquis!
The Peacocks are strutting behind velvet ropes,
sipping away on their heavenly dope.
Scratchin' the hatch with some sisters and lap-sons,
hand her one, pour us the ones with your daps on.
Surrender yourself doll, get down on your knees,
Let's open the flappers lets ruffle the keys!
Ladies of Virtue:
Am I low enough godaddy? (No no)
Am I low enough god-daddy (No no no)
Am I low enough godaddy?
The Agent:
Well alright! Gimme two alleluia's and an amen.
Ladies of Virtue:
Am I low enough godaddy? (No no)
Am I low enough god-daddy (No no no)
Am I low enough godaddy? (Whoowhee!)
Give me two alleluia's and an amen.
The Agent:
Up, up, up in perch we'll be squeaky swingin'
Standin' on edge just a pidgeon n' wingin'
Down in the boiler with a jitterin puff,
loosen the collars right up to the scruff.
So all of you bred high, down on the make out,
remember the garden, let's wiggle the snake now.
Fiddle the humbugs and howl like a pooch,
give her a swallow of heavenly hooch.
Ladies of Virtue:
Am I low enough godaddy? (No no)
Am I low enough god-daddy (No no no)
Am I low enough godaddy?
The Agent:
Mmhmm, Gimme lordy oh lordy hey lordy my lord!
Ladies of Virtue: Am I low enough godaddy? (No no)
Am I low enough god-daddy (No no no)
Am I low enough godaddy? (Mmhmm!)
Lordy oh lordy hey lordy my lord!
Swing!
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